Immigration Health Check

When you enter Korea on a visa, you most have a health screening for
immigration within the first 3 weeks of your arrival. The manager
decided it would be a great idea for me to have my health screening
right of the bus into Ulsan.

So we go to the hospital, and as soon as I enter the examination room
all eyes were on me, the foreigner. As I sit down, I see all of these
different stations set in a circle arond the room and I was informed
that I would be taking all of the examinations, while a room full of
Koreans watched my every move.

Chapter 1: Weight
I was asked to remove my shoes and stand on this scale with this long
pole sticking up out of it. I thought this contraption was just going
to tell them my weight. I stand on it and then the nurse comes to me
and tries to adjust my body because I was obvious doing something
wrong, so what do I do? I try to awkwardly correct the mistake
myself, and try turning around to face the pole. While this is
happening, this bar comes down from the top of this pole and bops me
on the head and that is when I realized that this pole is trying to
take my height as well. So this nurse moves my body around again until
I am face forward. I stand with my back straight against the pole.
They say outloud how talk I was in Korean as my Korean audience is
amazed at my freakish height.

Chapter 2: Hearing Test
A new nurse took me into a room labeled hearing test where she no joke
solely took measures of my chest and then sent me into a sound proof
room to listen for beeps on a machine. What my bust size
has to do with a hearing test. I know not

Chapter 3: X-Ray
This male nurse brought me into a room and shut the door and said "OK,
take bra off, shirt off. Put gown on." So, I went behind a curtain and
did as he said. He brought me to this machine and placed my chin on
this bar, he put my arms on my waist, and pushed them forward against
the machine. He pushes a button ands says "Punish it." When I did
nothing, he says louder "PUNISH IT!" I starred at him with an
extremely confused look on his face. He pulls me away from the machine
and says "Finish-e". Which is what he had been saying all along. A
then get dressed and moved to the next station.

Chapter 4: Not really sure what they were checking for.
This female nurse takes me behind a curtain and has me remove my shoes
and lay on the bed. She then tells me to pull my shirt up, which is
normal, my doctor at home does this when she examines my abdomen, so I
oblige and pull my shirt up to reveal my abdomen and she says "NO, up
all of the way!" I then give her an off look and look towards the
curtain because I know that the thin curtain is all the keeps my
Korean audience from seeing my "goods". I reluclently do as she says
and she attached all of these suction cups to my chest and then
connected something that looked like a car battery charger to my toes.
Not really sure what they were testing for....

Chapter 5: Urine Sample
How can a urine sample not be awkward, really. The male nurse sent me
off to the bathroom with a cup. Maybe its a combination of carrying
your own urine through a crowded room and being self conscious about if
your pee smells or is too dark (hey I had just got a 24 hour plane ride)
but it was not enjoyable. I handed the man my cup and watched as he
extracted to viles out of it and then he hands me the cup back. He
tells me to throw it away and I swear he pointed the trash can right
next to his desk. I thought to myself this is weird but he just pointed
to this trash can. Right as I am about to dump it in what seemed to be
this nurse's personal trash can he stops me and says "NO,NO!" and
points now to the restroom.

Chapter 6: The Blood Test
As I come back from the restroom, this same male nurse is already
upset with me because this dumb foreinger just tried to pour their pee
into his trash. He tells me to roll my sleeve up because he will be
taking my blood. Now, I am really into giving blood. I might be on the
edge of being addicted to giving blood. In the states, I give blood
religiously with my friends. I feel like its my super power, my gift
to the world. I absolutely love it, but when that male nurse barely
cleaned arm and jabbed that needle in my arm, I was not a happy
camper. In the US, they will clean your vein for 30 seconds, will look
at both arms to see which arm has a bigger vein, make a mark to see
the direction the vessel flows, gentle insert needle, and then bandage
your arm up properly. This guy gave me what appeared to be a wet wipe
and told me to hold it there until the blood stopped.

Chapter 7: Wrong Room
As I am making my way around the stations in the rooms, I try to enter
in the next room without being told to do so. The lady outside the
door was just smiling at me and I took that as a clue that it is my
turn to enter the room. As I try to walk in the room my manager grabs
my arm and says "NO, penis!" Confused as ever I look back a the sign
on the door it said "Prostate Examination"

And thus concludes my short story of my trip to the immigration health check.

Don't Radiation Rain on My Parade

I have a arrived in Korea and it is already beginning to feel like home. I got into Ulsan last Thursday morning and went straight to work. But before I started, I had to get an immigration health check. See the short story I wrote about that fateful hour in later posts.

Yes, it did radiation rain the day I came to Ulsan but the glowing as worn off so you can stop messaging me on my facebook wall and declaring war on my inbox (MOM).

Most children get sent to Korea with a jar of peanutbutter and maybe so homemade goodies. But no, my mom sent me with a radiation kit complete with a mask, protective eye wear, and of course sea kelp pills.

More to come. Love you all

Life Diet?!?!

I feel like about to go on a diet, but a huge life diet. If feel that I will have a restricted life in Korea, without access to the people, luxuries, and yes even food that I have grown so accustomed to. So lately, I have just pulled out all of the stops. Hanging out with so many people, going so many places, and eating a lot of hamburgers (when in Rome right?).

Well, I leaving in 12 hours and my room looks like a disaster.